Naysayers Beware

So, I have the great opportunity to have my work exhibited at two galleries in Chicago at the same time. This is a first for me. I am very excited about it. One show came so fast that I spent most of the week preparing and didn't have enough time to send out a press release or email announcement. Two shows, who could have imagined? I didn't. I love the idea. How cool!

But even with the attention that I am getting, the shows, the positive reactions to my new work, I am still taken back by those naysayers I run into. Trust me, I can find enough reasons on my own for why leaving a good paying corporate job to pursue art was a bad idea. I don't need any help there. But, I have managed to talk myself into believe that this is possible. I can go against the tide and live my dream life. And then I run into a naysayer. Those folks who have doubt in their voice along with the half ass words of encouragement. They are out there, everywhere, often in places where I least expect it.

It happened to me this afternoon. I ran into someone whom I thought would be supportive but was in reality a naysayer. I concluded today that there are a few ways I can handle the negativity I receive from this people. One way is I can take it to heart, agree with them, doubt what I am doing and attempting to do, give up and return to the rat race. (Hint: It is called a rat race for a reason. Does it sound good to you?) Another way is to feel sorry for them. I can imagine them scared and/or jealous individuals looking to take down others around them. I prefer, however, to take their comments of doom and gloom, of failure and disappointment, and leverage it to push me forward. Everyone thought Columbus was crazy. No one believed in the Wright Brothers. Men on the Moon? Impossible. (Impossible is Nothing, by the way) Honestly, why would I listen to anyone who tells me I can't do something. They don't know what I can or can't do. And if I'm completely honest, although I may know what I have done, I don't know what I am capable of doing either. But I have a better chance of realizing it than they do. Or put another way, instead of someone else defining what kind of life I will lead, I will do the defining. I will do the exploring and experimenting. And whatever I do, I realize I can do more that I ever thought possible.

Maybe it is a little rebellious but frankly I don't care. When someone tells me I can't do something that I want to do without any reason or basis in fact, I will try to prove them wrong. So, am I a successful artist already? I think so. I create art. I have enough to eat and a nice place to live. And, most importantly, I'm happy. Thank you for the push this afternoon.

I Expect You to Read This

A buzz word for me this week has been "expectations". I looked up the definition, which said, the act of expecting. That didn't explain it to me so I looked up "expecting".

1. a. To look forward to the probable occurrence or appearance of:
b. To consider likely or certain: expect to see them soon.
2. To consider reasonable or due:
3. To consider obligatory; require:
4. Informal To presume; suppose.

The last definition of the informal use, "to presume", triggered me. This is why I have been struggling with expecations lately, others expectations of me, and my expecations of others and myself. The focus is on the future and are often undeclared. (The undeclared expectations get me in trouble all the time.) All of a sudden, I see this word with a lot of power and influence now only on the future but also on how I feel and respond in the present and how I remember the past. It also impacts how I interact with others and the world. I gravitate towards people and situations where my expectations are fulfilled and drift away from situations where they are not. I end up manipulating my situation and my attitudes so that my expectations are realized one way or another.

If I expect something to happen tomorrow, and when tomorrow comes, something else had occurred, my expectations go unfulfilled. If my expectations continue to go unfulfilled, I remember that they have been lacking for a while and I noticed that my expectations change in such a way that I expect that they will be unfulfilled and thereby, I fulfill my new expectations, my expectation that my original expectations will not come true. My memory of the past influences what I want in the future. I don't want to be disappointed so I change the expectations to fit what "will" be coming along. On the flip side, if I often get what I want then over time, I learn to expect that I will get what I want. One way or another, my expectations will be realized. I heard it often described as writing my story. I have a story to that describes me, what has happened to me and what will happen to me. That story are my expectations.

So I throw in the exercise of focusing on the process and not the outcome and things get interesting for me. Expectations are focused on the future often outcomes. Therefore, the power of expectations may be reduced by concentrating on the here and now and doing instead of what might happen in the future. Wow! I can't imagine the impact of "letting go". My head is spinning a bit from all of this but I think there is something here. I wonder what is the impact of minimizing the effects of expectations. Perhaps that will free me to be more present in the moment and less critical in general. Perhaps this will help me "get out of the way" and let things unfold naturally. I don't think it is possible to eliminate expectations but I can see how changing them can play a pivotal role in the idea of positive thinking and manifestion. I can also see how reducing my concentration on them may change me to be more open and flexible.

When I sat down to write this afternoon, I had no idea what I was going to write about. I was without any expectations except that I would write something. I experienced exactly what I presupposed what would happen. It appears to me that my expectations were fulfilled once again.