Slow Start, Good Finish

When I woke up this morning, I didn't feel particularly creative.  And yet, I have paintings to finish and new ideas to begin.  I procrastinated for about an hour before I realized that my first newsletter was being sent out this afternoon.  The thought was the spark I needed to move a bit faster (okay, just move).

I decided on the pieces I was going to work on and when those were done for the day, which idea I was going to begin.  I changed into my painting clothes, old jeans and paint covered t-shirt, and stood there.  More procrastinating.  I walked over to the bonsai which of course needed water.  So I watered them.  They can't water themselves.  I moved some furniture around to have better flow and/or more space for me to work in (I haven't moved into my new studio yet).  No big surprise, the new furniture placement didn't result in a better flow or more space. 

So, standing in front of my workbench, which needs to be cleaned by the way, I stared at the mess, the used mixing cups, bottles of paint, gloves, etc.  All the items on the workbench needed a home.  I wanted so badly to reorganize but by that point I was quite aware I was procrastinating.  Then I was hit by a series of thoughts.  Will the newsletter be popular?  How will I increase my mailing list?  Can I use it in future to help generate sales?  Off my mind went.  It was thinking about everything and anything EXCEPT painting.  I think if someone held up a shiny object I would have been entranced by it.

Eventually, I started working.  In a very, very short period of time the random thoughts were gone.  Or at least I wasn't aware of them.  I was methodical, precise, intentional and quick.  Task after task, painting after painting, I kept going.  I was an art machine. 

At the point I was working on applying a based coat for a new piece I decided to start today, I was working very fast speading the resin over the large canvas before the resin began to set up.  About half way through, I was became aware that although the radio was on, I didn't notice it.  The earlier thoughts and urge to procrastinate were completely gone.  I felt like I was an extension of the painting, or the painting was an extension of me.  I'm not sure which.  Oddly, and unfortunately, when I became aware that I was in the flow, I immediately fell out of it.  As much as I tried to jump back into the flow I could not.  In fact, the more I worked for it, the more elusive it was. 

The thing I am grateful for is that I did get into the flow today, at least once.  I'm hoping I can get back there tomorrow.