Forget about Good

This past week, I took on the second recommendation from the "Incomplete Manifesto for Growth" by Bruce Mau:

"Forget about good. Good is a known quantity. Good is what we all agree on. Growth is not necessarily good. Growth is an exploration of unlit recesses that may or may not yield to our research. As long as you stick to good you'll never have real growth."

This was very difficult to do. The week was an emotional roller coaster. I was amazed by how many things and how easily I judged or prejudge something to be good or bad. Which brought me to my first realization. To forget about good, I also have to forget about bad. What does that leave? For me, the only thing left was "it is" or "doing." I spent a lot of time (and I suppose I have in the past as well) critiquing, judging, contemplating, or editorializing. This is good. This is bad. All that time I was "evaluating" "goodness" or "badness" was time I could have been doing. I wonder if I used it as a passive aggressive way to procrastinate.

So, nothing is good or bad. Okay, I can work with that I told myself. I began to work. I found it difficult to proceed. I had deeply ingrained inside me that my work especially had to fall into one of the two categories. When I "couldn't" place my work into a good bucket or bad bucket, that left me with just do it, finish it and notice what I like and what I dislike. Like and dislike are different from good or bad. These are emotions. Forgetting about good freed me in a way to see how I felt or how my paintings were impacting me. This is where the roller coaster came in. I had emotions. I wasn't a factory with a strict quality control program. It didn't matter if a piece didn't live up to standards because the standard had changed. The new standard was based on trying, doing and completing. Given I had spend many years of my professional life in quality control type jobs, I found this extremely difficult and began to question everything.

What is the impact if I expand "forget about good" to everything else in my life? Is there really such a thing as a bad decision? If I don't beat myself up for doing something wrong or congratulate myself for doing it right, what does that mean? It means it opens me up for growth, new opportunities or exploration. I can recognize what I like and what I don't like without something being good or bad. I can notice my feelings about a situation or object, and based on who I am and what I want out of life, determine my next move. It freed me to action (or complete inaction but that didn't last very long.)

One of the biggest things about good and bad is that I realized that most of the criteria I used for judging was external. It was other people's standards, other people's good and bad that I have learn, heard and collected over the years. This was the second hill of the roller coaster. I began to question those standards. Do I like it (or dislike it) or is this a voice from my past telling me what to think/do/act? Nine times out of ten, it was some one's voice in my head. What a pisser! All these years I considered myself an independent thinker and I felt I had been brainwashed. I ended the week with a mini-exorcism attempting to rid myself of these foreign ideas searching for my own. It didn't work. Other's ideas and standards are still there but I think I'm just a little bit better at recognizing when they start yelling at me "this painting is not your best work" or "this one is a masterpiece." My paintings are neither, according to me. They are tools for me to grow and explore and create. I'll let others judge them.

By the end of the week when things began to settle down, I experienced something incredible. I received four images for paintings. I quickly sketched them in my book and this morning began working on two of them. What a blessing! The painters block I had been experiencing broke open, I think partly because I was willing to take a chance without worrying about it's inherent "goodness."

I highly recommend trying "forget the good." But beware of the box that you may be opening. Trust me, stuff with come out, demons and angels alike. It will impact you. I would say for the better but I'm forgetting the good. So let's just say, it will impact you.

This week, I am tackling the third recommendation from the Manifesto:

"Process is more important than outcome. When the outcome drives the process we will only ever go to where we've already been. If process drives outcome we may not know where we’re going, but we will know we want to be there."

I had no idea what I was getting into when I decided to start this experiment of living the "Incomplete Manifesto." This is bigger than I ever imagined and only Heaven knows where the path will lead. So far, it has been a great experience. I'm glad I decided to do this.

Original Recipe

For several days now I've been feeling down, then I becamge blue and now I am just plain sad. I have no energy and want to sleep all the time. But guess what? I'm not sleeping very well either. I began to notice that although I've been a full time artist now for almost 3 months and I have created some very good and interesting pieces, they are not original. The inspiration for most have come from other people's art work. I've been imitating their style, technique, theme or color selection. I've gotten pretty good a doing so.

The problem I have with this is that as an artist, I feel that it is my job to create something original, to create something that is uniquely mine. When you look at a Picasso or a Miro, even if you haven't seen the painting before, you know who did it. Okay, I'm not famous (yet) and few know who I am but there isn't anything specifically "me" in my work. Right now, no one can say, "oh, that's a Nolan."

So, I'm thinking about what separates the Picasso's from the rest of the pack. I have concluded there are three things that stand out. First, there is an unique technique. The brush stoke, the colors, layout of the image are all very specific to the artist. Try as they may (and I may) other artists cannot complete replicate. It is one of a kind. The second is that they do not imitate. They are completely themselves. This is tightly coupled to the first. The paintings, as well as the artist, are honest. They are from the artist's soul. They are not superficial. And lastly, the artist has a message. Some are more obvious than others and the message often changes over time but the message is there. The combination of an unique style, honesty and a message I now believe is what helps create a good piece of art.

So, why am I sad? Because I have none of the three. I have been imitating others, I don't have a original technique nor a have I been honest. That is to say, I have been honestly mimicking others, but I haven't been honest in my creations. I haven't exposed my soul. And, I don't have a message. I don't feel like I have found my voice yet. This hit me like a brick in the head.

Here is the kicker. I know that I can develop an original technique or look. I know that I can be honest. And I know that I have a voice or message, I just don't know what it is today. All three will reveal themselves (hopefully soon). They will come out as I continue to experiment, play, and stay open (or become open). This is the hard part for me. I'm impatient. I want my signature creations now. I'm going to have to work for them. I have to paint even when I don't want to. I have to try new things even if I don't think they will work. And I have to listen to my gut for those elements that spark me and then capture the sensation, feeling or situation so others can "see" what I am "saying."

Being an artist is not all glitz and glamour. It is hard work. I want to take a nap.

Allow Events to Change You

Week one is done and it was much more difficult than I ever imagined. This past week I took one of the suggestions from Bruce Mau's "Incomplete Manifesto for Growth" and tried to incorporate it into my life and observe the results of doing so.

"Allow events to change you. You have to be willing to grow. Growth is different from something that happens to you. You produce it. You live it. The prerequisites for growth: the openness to experience events and the willingness to be changed by them."

For the first few days, I repeated to myself, "allow events to change you, allow events to change you." I noticed that I had changed the mantra to "be open to new events, be open to new events." A bit of a difference. I was looking, even searching for, new events or new opportunities to take advantage of and incorporate the tons of positive influence into my life. Although I did try a few new things and met several new people last week, nothing earth-shattering new occurred in my life. I was disappointed. I was poised to "accept it." I missed the point.

Let's get back to "allow events to change you." It isn't necessarily a new event or situation. It is being present in everyday tasks and familiar situations and experience a bit more out of them. I think that is how events may change me. I met new people in the course of my week, I heard some new ideas and I believe I made some new friends or at least new acquaintances. People, and their ideas, often inspire me or alter how I currently see things. So that part worked. I also was less intimidated by new situations since I was searching for a "changing event." I found myself more open and as a result more approachable. I noticed that I had bursts of extreme positivity and two days of amazing energy levels which resulted in very productive days.

By Friday, however, I was tired. I think I may have been trying too hard. I was running in every direction looking for something new, novel, change enhancing that I forgot to pace myself. I also lost sight, as I mentioned before, for the ordinary, which as I now type this, may have more affect on me that some big new experience. I also felt uneasy. Change is uncomfortable, unfamiliar.

Overall, the event that had the most impact on me last week was deciding to attempt to live this suggestion. It helped me focus, to me more aware, to be more open, to be searching. Have I noticed a life altering impact? No. Or at least not yet. The nice part is since I now have clarified the objective, be open to change, not necessarily something new (although I'm sure that would work too), I think this may be a mantra I will keep. I suspect over time, allowing events to change me will have an enormous, positive impact.

This week I will focus on: "Forget about good. Good is a known quantity. Good is what we all agree on. Growth is not necessarily good. Growth is an exploration of unlit recesses that may or may not yield to our research. As long as you stick to good you'll never have real growth."

I Want a Nap

All day today, my butt has been dragging. I got more than enough sleep last night and I am finally over my cold but my energy level is very low. I feel like I have narcolepsy. I just want to crash and take a nap. I went to the gym this morning to start my engine, nothing. I ate lunch early thinking that perhaps my blood sugar was low (like that ever happens). That wasn't it. I ran to Starbucks this afternoon for a cookie and coffee with no success. Today is just one of those days. Today I have to coast.

I looked at my "to do" list for the week and there are many things I didn't do or finish yet. I was feeling very guilty earlier. But I do know that I cannot force things. If I attempt to paint, or do anything creative for that matter, when I'm in this state, it wouldn't work out well. I also doubt there would be any pleasant mistakes to spur me forward or inspire me. I have to admit it. I'm void of inspiration today. The well is dry, for today. Not completely dry, I'm writing.

The day wasn't a total lost. I did do several administrative type tasks and I wrote today. I decided that since I did to things that will help overall to push things forward, today is not a waste. It is just a slow day. I have troubles giving myself permission not to be a Rock Star everyday. Sometimes I need down time. That time is today.

Tomorrow, I will try again.

But, if I look back at the week as a whole. There were some "slower" days and some very productive days. All in all, I'm ahead of where I was last Friday. I think I will focus on that. I will focus on what I did accomplish versus what I didn't. Next week, I'll do some more.

I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up

Attached to my computer screen you will find Post It Notes, old photos, fortunes from fortune cookies, etc.. From what I have learned, this is not conducive to a productive work environment. However, they give me comfort, remind me of things I need to do, remind me of things I enjoy, and on occasion, give me things to avoid and ignore when I'm too lazy to avoid that task at hand. One of the notes on my screen is an old Japanese proverb. It states,

"Fall seven times. Get up Eight."

When I came across this proverb, I really didn't understand how deep the proverb really was. I just knew that it resonated with me. So I kept it. It now occupies the prestigious spot of eye level on the right side of my screen. I see it every time I reach for the mouse.

Over the six months or so it has been sitting there, I must have read it a thousand times, each time pondering what is this great message these short two sentences have that is so deep and profound as to become a proverb. I don't know. I do have my interpretation of it however.

I remember when I was a kid and in school, many things came easy to me. I liked school. I liked learning (I still do). But I've noticed, especially lately, new things don't come as easily as they did in the past. I try, stumble, fail, crash and burn, explode, run into walls, experience spontaneously combustion and every other euphemism for not succeeding, at first. Okay, at second and third attempts too. But, given enough motivation and a true drive for success, I do, eventually, reach my goal. I think is one of the messages of the proverb.

But that is too obvious and too easy. There is more to it. This is not a focus on success or reaching a goal. This is a focus on trying, attempting to do something that doesn't come easy. To go for it when everyone around you (and every bone in your body) is telling you that you are doomed if you try but you know in your heart that you have to. You know it is the right thing to do. It is a calling. And you start, knowing you will get hit in the head with a board, get knocked down, maybe even bleed a little (a little blood letting was thought to be good for your health in medieval times) just to get up and go through it all again. What I have experienced however, is that the second failure is not as bad as the first, the third not as bad and the second and so on. And, believe it or not, as long as I keep my intention pure and my motivation high (and trust me there are days when I want to go back to when things were easy), I stop failing and start succeeding. Success beyond what I ever thought possible. And, besides the obvious sense of accomplishment that comes with this type of success, I've grown. I'm a bit wiser (hopefully) for the experience, and those other challenges that I have looked at but never dreamed of attempting, they don't look as scary as they did before. Okay, a few do. But many don't. And because I learned from the past challenge, maybe I won't fall down as hard or as many times with the next adventure.

So, I'm going to paraphrase the proverb, try and try again. Expect to fall down. It only hurts a little. But expect to stand back up again, bigger, stronger, smarter, wiser and more skillful than before. Just don't forget to take the antibacterial cream and band-aids. Just in case.

Incomplete Manifesto for Growth

A few months ago, a very good friend emailed me a link to "An Incomplete Manifesto for Growth" by Bruce Mau. To quote the web site, "Written in 1998, the Incomplete Manifesto is an articulation of statements exemplifying Bruce Mau’s beliefs, strategies and motivations. Collectively, they are how we approach every project." I found the 43 statements intriguing. I specifically wondered how each of these statements, some which surprised or confused me, could impact not only my creative growth but my personal or spiritual growth as well. 43 things to keep in mind on a daily basis seemed overwhelming to me. At the same time, I doubt that practicing one or two statements/ideas would have a noticeable impact. I believe there may be a cumulative effect. Or at least I hope so.

When friends ask me for advice now and again about trying new things, I almost always suggest to try it, what is there to lose? It is time I take my own advice. For the next 43 weeks, I will take one of the statements from the "Incomplete Manifesto for Growth" and attempt to incorporate it into my daily life. I will document here each Monday what I experienced, what worked, what didn't, what hurdles I ran into, and the noticeable impact. I have no idea what I am in for. This could be a day in the park, or not. I suspect somewhere in the middle. I also wonder how many of the statements I will find useful and how many I will alter to fit my stage of life. All of this I will try to share with you.

So, lets get to it. I'm going to attempt them in order as written. The first one is:

"1. Allow events to change you. You have to be willing to grow. Growth is different from something that happens to you. You produce it. You live it. The prerequisites for growth: the openness to experience events and the willingness to be changed by them."

This sounds like a challenge if I ever heard one. Off the top of my head, I'm not sure how to incorporate this into my life but that is what this process is looking to discover. I'll keep you posted.

Below is the entire "Incomplete Manifesto for Growth". The is also a version is Spanish.

1. Allow events to change you. You have to be willing to grow. Growth is different from something that happens to you. You produce it. You live it. The prerequisites for growth: the openness to experience events and the willingness to be changed by them.

2. Forget about good. Good is a known quantity. Good is what we all agree on. Growth is not necessarily good. Growth is an exploration of unlit recesses that may or may not yield to our research. As long as you stick to good you'll never have real growth.

3. Process is more important than outcome. When the outcome drives the process we will only ever go to where we've already been. If process drives outcome we may not know where we’re going, but we will know we want to be there.

4. Love your experiments (as you would an ugly child). Joy is the engine of growth. Exploit the liberty in casting your work as beautiful experiments, iterations, attempts, trials, and errors. Take the long view and allow yourself the fun of failure every day.

5. Go deep. The deeper you go the more likely you will discover something of value.

6. Capture accidents. The wrong answer is the right answer in search of a different question. Collect wrong answers as part of the process. Ask different questions.

7. Study. A studio is a place of study. Use the necessity of production as an excuse to study. Everyone will benefit.

8. Drift. Allow yourself to wander aimlessly. Explore adjacencies. Lack judgment. Postpone criticism.

9. Begin anywhere. John Cage tells us that not knowing where to begin is a common form of paralysis. His advice: begin anywhere.

10. Everyone is a leader. Growth happens. Whenever it does, allow it to emerge. Learn to follow when it makes sense. Let anyone lead.

11. Harvest ideas. Edit applications. Ideas need a dynamic, fluid, generous environment to sustain life. Applications, on the other hand, benefit from critical rigor. Produce a high ratio of ideas to applications.

12. Keep moving. The market and its operations have a tendency to reinforce success. Resist it. Allow failure and migration to be part of your practice.

13. Slow down. Desynchronize from standard time frames and surprising opportunities may present themselves.

14. Don’t be cool. Cool is conservative fear dressed in black. Free yourself from limits of this sort.

15. Ask stupid questions. Growth is fueled by desire and innocence. Assess the answer, not the question. Imagine learning throughout your life at the rate of an infant.

16. Collaborate. The space between people working together is filled with conflict, friction, strife, exhilaration, delight, and vast creative potential.

17. ____________________. Intentionally left blank. Allow space for the ideas you haven’t had yet, and for the ideas of others.

18. Stay up late. Strange things happen when you’ve gone too far, been up too long, worked too hard, and you're separated from the rest of the world.

19. Work the metaphor. Every object has the capacity to stand for something other than what is apparent. Work on what it stands for.

20. Be careful to take risks. Time is genetic. Today is the child of yesterday and the parent of tomorrow. The work you produce today will create your future.

21. Repeat yourself. If you like it, do it again. If you don’t like it, do it again.

22. Make your own tools. Hybridize your tools in order to build unique things. Even simple tools that are your own can yield entirely new avenues of exploration. Remember, tools amplify our capacities, so even a small tool can make a big difference.

23. Stand on someone’s shoulders. You can travel farther carried on the accomplishments of those who came before you. And the view is so much better.

24. Avoid software. The problem with software is that everyone has it.

25. Don’t clean your desk. You might find something in the morning that you can’t see tonight.

26. Don’t enter awards competitions. Just don’t. It’s not good for you.

27. Read only left-hand pages. Marshall McLuhan did this. By decreasing the amount of information, we leave room for what he called our "noodle."

28. Make new words. Expand the lexicon. The new conditions demand a new way of thinking. The thinking demands new forms of expression. The expression generates new conditions.

29. Think with your mind. Forget technology. Creativity is not device-dependent.

30. Organization = Liberty. Real innovation in design, or any other field, happens in context. That context is usually some form of cooperatively managed enterprise. Frank Gehry, for instance, is only able to realize Bilbao because his studio can deliver it on budget. The myth of a split between "creatives" and "suits" is what Leonard Cohen calls a 'charming artifact of the past.'

31. Don’t borrow money. Once again, Frank Gehry’s advice. By maintaining financial control, we maintain creative control. It’s not exactly rocket science, but it’s surprising how hard it is to maintain this discipline, and how many have failed.

32. Listen carefully. Every collaborator who enters our orbit brings with him or her a world more strange and complex than any we could ever hope to imagine. By listening to the details and the subtlety of their needs, desires, or ambitions, we fold their world onto our own. Neither party will ever be the same.

33. Take field trips. The bandwidth of the world is greater than that of your TV set, or the Internet, or even a totally immersive, interactive, dynamically rendered, object-oriented, real-time, computer graphic–simulated environment.

34. Make mistakes faster. This isn’t my idea -- I borrowed it. I think it belongs to Andy Grove.

35. Imitate. Don’t be shy about it. Try to get as close as you can. You'll never get all the way, and the separation might be truly remarkable. We have only to look to Richard Hamilton and his version of Marcel Duchamp’s large glass to see how rich, discredited, and underused imitation is as a technique.

36. Scat. When you forget the words, do what Ella did: make up something else ... but not words.

37. Break it, stretch it, bend it, crush it, crack it, fold it.

38. Explore the other edge. Great liberty exists when we avoid trying to run with the technological pack. We can’t find the leading edge because it’s trampled underfoot. Try using old-tech equipment made obsolete by an economic cycle but still rich with potential.

39. Coffee breaks, cab rides, green rooms. Real growth often happens outside of where we intend it to, in the interstitial spaces -- what Dr. Seuss calls "the waiting place." Hans Ulrich Obrist once organized a science and art conference with all of the infrastructure of a conference -- the parties, chats, lunches, airport arrivals — but with no actual conference. Apparently it was hugely successful and spawned many ongoing collaborations.

40. Avoid fields. Jump fences. Disciplinary boundaries and regulatory regimes are attempts to control the wilding of creative life. They are often understandable efforts to order what are manifold, complex, evolutionary processes. Our job is to jump the fences and cross the fields.

41. Laugh. People visiting the studio often comment on how much we laugh. Since I've become aware of this, I use it as a barometer of how comfortably we are expressing ourselves.

42. Remember. Growth is only possible as a product of history. Without memory, innovation is merely novelty. History gives growth a direction. But a memory is never perfect. Every memory is a degraded or composite image of a previous moment or event. That’s what makes us aware of its quality as a past and not a present. It means that every memory is new, a partial construct different from its source, and, as such, a potential for growth itself.

43. Power to the people. Play can only happen when people feel they have control over their lives. We can't be free agents if we’re not free.

Too Sick to Work?

For most of this week, I have been suffering from a head cold. It has been a doozy. It has wiped me out, physically and emotionally. I didn't want to work. I just wanted to sleep the day away. It wasn't possible. I tried. When I attempted to take a nap, instead of relaxing, sleeping and recuperating, I laid there wide awake wondering how everything I wanted to do this week was going to be accomplished. I didn't feel creative with a pounding headache. So I focused on the administrative things I wanted to finish up this week. I thought those would be benign enough (remembering my corporate days when I went to work sick all the time) that I could push things forward even if it weren't at the speed things would move if I were healthy. No such luck. I found the administrative tasks annoying. Basically, nothing was going to make me happy. I went back to bed.

This went on for a few days. I would start something, not finish it, go lie down, get up and start it again. I also forced myself to be creative for a bit. I mixed up a color for the next layer of resin I wanted to add to two pieces I'm working on. I followed through to completion. Although I felt a sense of accomplishment, I was disappointed. I didn't like the color selection. It obviously was reflecting my state of mind at the time. It was just a little bit off, like I was. I went back to bed.

This morning, after a restless night of sleep, I felt a little better. Or I should say, I felt I was on the road to recovery to rejoin the living. But even though I wasn't feeling 100% yet, I felt inspired. I felt it was time to tackle something. I was energized but I didn't have much energy. I was encouraged and optimistic but still wanted to go back to bed. I decided to get up and go to work, like it was any other day. I'm glad I did. I added the next layer to the pieces I had been working on all week and although I still don't like the color from yesterday, I thought of a way to incorporate it into the pieces as I continue to pour additional layers. I KNOW that this "off" color will work perfectely when I add the other colors later. The "play" I was looking for will be there, probably better than if I had done what the original idea. I suddenednly began to love the color. I also began a new piece, one I had be "avoiding" becuase the concept seemed challenging. Although it was a challenge, it wasn't as bad as I had imagined. My conclusion is that I was inspired and creative even in my sick state. My ability to create is not dependent on my mood or physical ability. My ability to create is on my willingness and intention to create. Any my perserverance to push through fueled the fire so to speak. I had more to work with today, if that makes any sense. It is kind of like I know and can do "it" when things are not perfect, I can't imagine what I can "do" when things are nearly perfect. It pushed me up a rung on the ladder.

I once heard, and still believe it today, that there are no mistakes in art. Art happens. It is the result of creation. If I take it at face value, it seems obvious that my work this week would be at the same caliber as if I were healthy. But I realized a few things. First, I want to love "my mistakes." Those ugly ducklings that I produce. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and perhaps those "mistakes" are signpost to a new direction that will yield bigger and greater success. I also learned to get out of my own way. Having a cold drained my energy and my resolve. I didn't have to fortitude to do what I envisioned for the piece. I just did something to placate my guilt. I'm glad I did. My guard was down and the result will be a unique color combination I would not have intentionally tried. I want to find a way to drop my guard when I'm feeling better. I want to maintain a resolve to create without putting conditions on the outcome. I want to enjoy all my work, not because I declared it good or bad, but simply because I helped in its creation. But ultimately I learned that I want to create whenever I have the chance. To just keep going. Today builds on yesterday and if I didn't build anything yesterday, where is my foundation for today? That sounds a be heady but I think you know what I mean.

Creative Affirmations

I recently started reading "The Artist's Way, A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity" by Julia Cameron. It is a course in how to access greater creativity. I haven't completed reading the book yet so I haven't formed an opinion but there are aspects I do like. It is geared towards creative types such as artists, there are many suggestions that I think would work for all. Everyone is creative time and again afterall. One recommendation in early in the book is to review and use Creative Affirmations everyday. Now, I admit, when I first read this I had a flashback to the old SNL skit of "Daily Affirmations with Stuart Smalley". I chuckled at the idea of me giving myself kudos in front of a mirror every morning. Needless to say, I don't. I enjoy watching Stuart Smalley but I don't want to become him. All this seemed to be a little bit too much for me. But I decided since it was at the beginning of the book and not the end, I should give it a try. The other exercises to come may be just as, if not more, uncomfortable.

Now, I just read the affirmations silently to myself. I know of some people who prefer to write them down or speak them out loud. I don't think it makes a difference. The point is to focus on them often. Positive energy is positive energy. Keep it simple, find what works for you.

I did laugh and felt incredibly uncomfortable and, do I dare say it, I felt stupid doing this. I felt like I was Stuart Smalley. Julia Cameron warned in her book that this most likely happen (not the Stuart Smalley part, just feeling uncomfortable). It did! I felt very uncomfortable. Not only did I feel like a fool doing this, I wonder how this would help and where the nearest tree I should hug was. As I read each affirmation, I noticed some impacted me differently. Some made my uncomfortable, others made me laugh, others gave me a warm feeling inside. I noticed that those affirmations that made me uncomfortable somehow were triggering my own insecurities. Take notice of the ones that you don't like saying (or reading). I found that is where I got the biggest bang for the buck. Those affirmations hit me in spots I didn't want to be hit, but need to. Those were the spots for the most growth. Pay attention to that. Growth is good, avoidance is not.

The Creative Affirmations weren't for me, or at least I thought. I continued doing them. Not everyday but once in a while. What I noticed that on the days I reflected (I like that term much better) on the affirmations, things went better that day. I was in a good mood. I had more energy. I not only enjoyed working on my art, I was eager to do so. It showed in my work as well. My interactions with people were even better.

I am still struggling to reflect on the affirmations daily but it gives me a goal to shoot for. I still find some of them funny, and some of them uncomfortable (those I tend to read twice). And I still feel silly at times wondering if the ghost of Stuart Smalley has entered my body. But I'm going to continue with these, at least for a while, to see how these may impact my creative life and my life in general.

My advice on these are:
1) They are for everyone, not just artists.
2) Reflect on them as often as you can.
3) Go ahead, feel silly. No one is watching.
4) Pay attention to how you feel on each one.

Below is the "starter list" from Julia Cameron's book, "The Artist's Way, A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity." Pick and choose a few or make up a few of your own. If you do find some new ones that work for you, please send them to me. I'd like to add them to my list.

Creative Affirmations by Julia Cameron
1. I am a channel for God's creativity, and my work comes to good.
2. My dreams come from God and God has the power to accomplish them.
3. As I create and listen, I will be led.
4. Creativity is the creator's will for me.
5. My creativity heals myself and others.
6. I am allowed to nurture my artist.
7. Through the use of a few simple tools, my creativity will flourish.
8. Through the use of my creativity, I serve God.
9. My creativity always leads me to truth and love.
10. My creativity leads me to forgiveness and self-forgiveness.
11. There is a divine plan of goodness for me.
12. There is a divine plan of goodness for my work.
13. As I listen to the creator within, I am led.
14. As I listen to my creativity I am led to my creator.
15. I am willing to create.
16. I am willing to learn to let myself create.
17. I am willing to let God create through me.
18. I am willing to be of service through my creativity.
19. I am willing to experience my creative energy.
20. I am willing to use my creative talents.

Safe Harbors

Most mornings before I start my work day, I read several inspirational or motivational quotes to help set a positive tone for the day. Some of my favorites come from The Foundation for a Better Life which are posted on my website, www.nolanstudios.com/dailyquote.html. This morning I received the following quote by William G.T. Shedd 1820-1894. "A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for."

It got me thinking this morning as I was finishing up an art piece (I'm an artist but I'll discuss that in another entry). So often I start an art piece aiming low, attempting to do something, whether paintings or resin work, that I have done before, something conservative. I kind of know in advanced what the end result will be and how the piece will look when I'm finished. But a lot of my work that I enjoy, appreciate and am most proud of are those where I didn't go in with any preconcieved expectations. They are surprises. Or at least, I recognize that I was in my "comfort zone" and consciously decided to move a little bit outside. I end up doing something I having done before, sometimes big, sometimes small. But in the end, I have a piece of art that is completely an original and I have a great sense of satisfaction in producing it. If I never took a step back and left my "harbor", the art piece would not even exist.

What I've also noticed that I may fall back into the familiar often but I only have to push myself a little once in a while and, over time, I began to see big changes. Both in my work and in my personal views. In doing so, my style of art I produce has shifted from pop art paintings to modern/contemporary resin work, all accomplished little by little, not in one big push.

I have found an easy prescription for these life nudges that seems to work for me. When I recognize that I'm in a rut, when I am merely going through the motions but not feeling very excited or energized by what I am doing or about to do, I find it helps me to write it down. I used to use a formal document but now I use any piece of scrap paper I have lying around. The idea is by writing it down, I acknowledge what I am feeling. It also helps to see it. It becomes real and not just feeling flying around in my head. After I can see it on paper, I reread the sentence(s) and figure out which part I'm not happy with (or worse, bored) and ask myself "what if I change...". For example, I was working on a series of abstract pieces that consisted of layers of different swatches of colors but they all started with a black background. What if I used a different color as the background? I chose white. The result was very cool. The piece felt lighter, more vibrant, and more crisp. If I had stayed with black (which I still use all the time - I trust it) I would not have this other option at my finger tips. Of course, now I'm really curious what would happen if I start with RED! Maybe I'll try that someday but for now, I ventured out of my harbor and when the winds blow again, I set out to open seas.