Late Bloomer

My friend Nancy sent me a link to a New Yorker article (http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2008/10/20/081020fa_fact_gladwell?printable=true) which talks about the differnces between a artisty prodigy and a late bloomer. I encourage you to read it.

I often consider myself a late bloomer artistically speaking. I didn't really get the calling until my late 30's and by that point I had had several careers of varying levels of success. The path I was on could have easily provided me with a stable, comfortable life. Then I began painting. I painted my first portrait, of my grandfather, the day I heard he was terminally sick. Although this painting is immature in many ways, it reminds me of the emotions I had that day. And it shows. For that, the painting is not for sale.

I continued painting for years on the side as a hobby. The hobby began to take over my thoughts. The urge to create became large. I found corporate jobs that allowed me to create more with my desk job but with time, I no longer found that satisfying. I had to break out on my own, in more ways than one. In Fall of 2008, I found myself alone in the middle of Madrid, a city I had dreamt of visiting since my first day of Spanish class in high school. It was a dream come true. It was also incredible lonely. My Spanish sucked. And even though I was attending classes all day long, my language abilities could not progress fast enough. I spent most of the time alone, no conversation.

Admitting to myself that I probably would not be hitting the nightlife in Madrid, I went to the incredible museums the city has to offer. The modern art museum housed collections of some of my favorite paintings such as Picasso, Miró, Gris, Dalí, etc. I stared for an hour at "Guerneca" by Picasso. I wanted to do that. I looked at it closer. I eventually began to walk back to my hotel with the paintings racing through my head. This is what I wanted to do. No doubts at all. Then all the insecurities hit circling the one fateful question, "How?"

So the plan was set and has been activated since then. Today is one year after my trip to Spain. I'm painting full time but not yet selling in large quantities. I'm looking for a balance between working as a consultant to feed my stomach and working as an artist to feel my soul. I know it will all work out in the end and the end isn't point. It is the process of creating and re-creating time and again is what I am looking forward to.